Perpetual Sadness with Spontaneous Outbreaks of Joy

I am legitimately tired.

I see everything that’s happened in the world and I am tired. I am tired of people, I am tired of humans, I am tired of us. All we are doing is killing each other. And no reason is a good reason to murder.

Obama was right, it’s not a black issue. But it’s also not an American issue. It’s a human issue. Dogs don’t walk around trying to kill other dogs because they don’t like the way their hair is cut, or what language they bark in, or which God they believe in. We don’t belong on this planet; we are roughage: taking up valuable living space for other beings that don’t kill for sport.

Besides just the senseless murders that have happened in the past 30 days, there’s more. There’s just simply being terrible, selfish people. Ignoring when someone needs help or turning away from something that shouldn’t be happening. We are to blame. As much as we’d like to say “it’s been like this for years and we cannot stop it”, we can. WE, not I. As a person, we can hashtag and cry and protest and fundraise and donate and volunteer, but as people, we should change. We won’t, but we should.

I’ll ask this again, who are we? Are we those people that hashtag a name and dedicate our Facebook to one cause while millions of people die miles away that we won’t even know about? Are we going to defend “Black lives matter” and yet ignore when police officers (who probably agree that black lives DO matter) are murdered in the streets?

We are matter. We will always be matter. And as living, breathing people, we matter now, but eventually we won’t anymore. Trayvon will be forgotten and commemorated through Wikipedia pages for our grandchildren. The 49 Pulse victims will be forgotten just like the 2,977 September 11 victims. We will forget as we age. We will forget to tell our children. They will learn in school about them and wonder, “How does this affect me?” We’ll plan parties, have birthdays, enjoy life, and forget, because that’s what we do.

Evolve. Make change. Not just by yourself but with others. Take the time to love someone who probably needs to be loved right now. Take time to enjoy the people around you because one day they could be gone.

Maybe, by some small chance, we can stop ourselves from ruining this world we’ve been gifted and never deserved.


Not Guilty…not so much…

This Saturday marked the end of the State vs Zimmerman trial here in Orlando, Florida. The case began small, from the city of Sanford then to the entire Central Florida area, then to the Nation. As a resident of Central Florida, the case of a 17 year old black “boy” murdered by a 30-something (I can’t be bothered to learn his actual age) mixed race Hispanic man only made Floridians, as a community, to feel like we are again at the butt of all the jokes.

Thank goodness Jodi Arias was from Arizona.

If the Casey Anthony fiasco was any representation of what was approaching with the Zimmerman case, Central Florida was in for another wild ride and we were not disappointed. With the whole nation, most especially the black community, eyeing that Sanford courtroom, our corner of the world became a petri dish representing the social climate of the United States of America in 2013. Attorneys Mark O’Mara and Don West, who represented George Zimmerman, spent most of the trial post week appearing on both national and local news and talk outlets to reiterate the lack of racial focus in the trial.

Wait, I’m sorry. This wasn’t a race issue?

Despite the fact that Zimmerman is half white, half hispanic, many in the community misidentify him as strictly white. In one case, I heard him referred to as a “Jew” due to his last name. Talk about racial profiling. The fact is that although racism is not as obvious as it had been with separate schools and water fountains, it still remains today and that bulge we swept under the carpet keeps tripping us along as we press through life. Racial stereotypes can’t disappear if we continue to perpetuate it. Rioting in response to a not guilty verdict…maybe not the most rational of responses.

In terms of law, the trial was not, in my opinion, a miscarriage of justice. The time and money wasted by the State in trying to find items that proved Zimmerman profiled Trayvon Martin was all for naught.  They should have spent more time developing their case and maybe then they wouldn’t have had to worry about all their witnesses flipping for the defense. Granted, it’s possible that Martin defended himself, its possible he fought Zimmerman to try to get away, its possible Zimmerman wasn’t really as hurt as he said. But we have nothing that actually contradicts the evidence that the defense had proving that Zimmerman was hurt, and there was an altercation.

Possible but not proven.

There were only two people there that night and one of them is dead. Now all we have is moldy clothing and sour-faced Zimmerman relatives.

I have sympathy for the Martin family, sympathy for the Zimmerman family. But most especially, I have sympathy for the jury whose duty it was to decide Zimmerman’s fate and ultimately, the Martin family’s fate. Do we depend on our emotions to decide one’s life or do we do what is right and use facts and evidence to make a choice? As Zimmerman heads into hiding, it’s these folks that will be the only ones left to answer for their choices.